VC Eligibility criteria

A friend has researched Sergeant Edmond O'Toole who was awarded the VC for an action the Battle of Ulundi. Lord William Leslie de la Poer Beresford went to the assistance of a sergeant who had come off his horse. Sergeant O'Toole went to help him but as so often happens, only the officer was awarded the VC.

But when he went to be presented with the VC he is reported to have said this.

Her Majesty pinning it on to the hero's breast, but not before he had explained to his Queen he could not in honour receive recognition of any services he had been able to perform, unless Sergeant O'Toole's services were also recognised, as he deserved infinitely greater credit than any that might attach to himself. The Queen, appreciating this generosity and soldierly honesty, bestowed the reward also on Sergeant Edmund OToole of Baker's Horse, and Lord William was satisfied.

All the references had O'Toole as being the first South African VC but my friend has managed to prove that he was Irish. The references also had him as dying in 1891 but it has been shown he was alive in 1900. It is not known where he died and what happened to the medal.